Why Doctor’s Offices Have Lousy Waiting Magazines?

Have you ever wondered why the magazines in doctor’s offices are always outdated and dreadful to read?  A new study explains why this unfortunate circumstance is a part of our lives. The results may be shocking. 

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Humanity dreads the occasion when we need to visit the doctor. But, it’s not the smell, or the long wait, or the other numerous irritants that make the trip so unbearable, the most vile part of the experience are the painfully dull and horribly outdated magazines in the lobby.

One doctor decided to finally cease the madness and restore sanity to humanity, by creating a study on why doctor’s offices have horrible magazines. The hero of this story, and possibly the hero of all human life, is named Bruce Arroll. Aside from liberating society from the oppression of depression inducing outdated magazines, he is also a Professor.

To begin this study, Professor Arroll, and his rag-tag band of scientists, placed 87 magazines, some boring (Time magazine, The Economist, Australian Women’s Weekly,BBC History, National Geographic) and some great, (gossip and scandal type, tabloid magazines) in the lobby of a general practitioners office, in New Zealand.

47 of the magazines were less than 2 months old, the rest were a minimum of 3 months to over a year old. All of the magazines included both the date of publication on the front cover, but also a super secret serial number on the back to track the magazines; only the researchers were aware of the serial numbers. At first the magazines were watched closely for two-weeks.

The goal of the 2 week surveillance was to observe what magazines, if any, ‘diapered’ first. By stealthy observing the magazines in this manner, the team was able to calculate the percentage of total magazine loss, as well as the rate of magazine loss; comparing old magazines, versus new magazines, along with boring magazines, versus the good magazines, that are all about celebrity gossip.

the study continued for 31 days and once the observation had ceased, 41 magazines remained. The team calculated the numbers and ascertained these results:

  • 1.32 magazines ‘disappear’ per day
  • More recent magazines disappear 59 percent sooner than older magazines
  • The ‘good’ gossip oriented magazines were more likely to ‘vanish’
  • No one steals boring magazines from doctors offices
  • Only one gossip magazine remained

The study presents the fact, that doctors are not intentionally torturing their patients by deliberately providing old, boring and out dated magazines. The torture is caused by other patients, who steal all the good magazines from the lobbies of doctor’s offices.

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